and so..it is hard

It is hard to maintain a consistent motivation to do things. Yes it is.

Example No.1

At work:

I have never been so lazy neglecting my lesson plans EXCEPT for one class. Physical Edu class. Don't get me wrong here, I love teaching Physical Edu and that's one of the reason, I said "Yes" when being asked to teach that class even though it is not my option.

But, i just don't like to follow the syllabus and I seriously don't have any clue on how to do the lesson plan for P.E class. It is way different from writing a Science / Maths lesson plan. Those psikomotor, afektif and what not terms...Argh!

Besides my BM sucks to the max, let alone I have to write one with those weird terms.

And so, recently my head of panitia ask for my lesson plan and student's work. OMG. I really don't expect this coming. 

I did teach the class but I never follow the syllabus and so they don't have any written work. Have been teaching them for 2 months already and the class is only once a week. I can't even afford to write lesson plan and give them work. All this while I just teach them the practical stuff on the field...Ooh, a bad and screwed up teacher I am!

Given that circumstances, I am ready to be called by the head of department and need to do some explanation.

In the meantime, I have to start doing my work * documentation is a must a.k.a lesson plan * As much as I hated it, I HAVE TO! ~sigh

Example 2

On workout regime:

I am officially worshipping the Victoria's Secret models. 

Oooh, when will I have those kind of abs. *I have the exact style of bikini just that it's black in colour but I look like a marshmallow wearing a bikini when I wear that*.. I am dying for abs like that. Anyone who have any tips on how to achieve that...Tell me please....

Been running on the mill almost everyday and did some situps, some toning exercises for my arms yet it seems not enough and well-targeted. One thing for sure it's because it's hard to maintain that motivation. Ohohoho.

Like today, I felt like dying while running on the mill because my head says no to running and my legs are plainly lazy today. I always hated gravity, how I wish there's a pool nearby so that swimming will be the best form of exercise.

Healthy eating also one of the biggest problem that I have to overcome. Sweet cravings please go away!!!!!!

Tulung la. My mission this time is to do this without the direct help of any particular meal replacement program. I seriously wanted to make this a lifestyle instead.

Example 3:

Any other things in life.

Lately, I am just so NOT IN THE ZONE. you know what I mean? It is like everytime I am doing something, it is just SO hard to maintain focus.

From reading a book to the end until things like planning a project, it is just not easy to maintain a motivation that comes from within. I need people to push me sometimes. Dang! So NOT independent.

Conclusion:

I felt that I am burned out. Habis diperah, kering segala-galanya. Need some time off maybe. Do something fun and get back to work. 

So, peeps, anyone wanna paint the town red on friday night? Cuti bah tu..haha