Tuesday, January 10, 2017

It's an open secret


End of September 2016

When I did my home pregnancy test after my period was late for two weeks. Hey! I got the shock of my life. I was stunned! You know some people who have been waiting for good news, they will be like crying and jumping for joy and what not. I was just STUNNED. The next thing I did was not calling people up or even setting appointment with a doctor. I just sat there for a while looking at the result. Silence. It is a mixed of emotions.


Then I started contacting two fitness instructors whom I see as a mentor to consult them on being pregnant and continue teaching fitness classes in their first trimester. The next thing I know that I did was contacting studio owners to give a notice that I will not be teaching some of the fitness classes anymore starting for the next two weeks. Just with the reason that I am busy with my studies. I am just not ready to break the news to anyone just yet. Nobody should know just yet.

Mister came home and I told him the news. The reaction I got? Not the typical jumping for joy and hugging the wife. It is also just silence. We were both stunned! Hahahaha. Happily stunned? Is there even a word for that. LOL. We both know that our lives are about to change.

Life changing 

Only this year that we decided we should be trying to have kids but everything get halted since both of us were down with dengue somewhere in April and it took almost three months for the body to actually function like normal. I have to stay sober for almost three months after dengue just to make sure alcohol won't damage my liver. I lose my hair and all. Starting trying again and for several months, usually the pregnancy test will turn out negative and I will start to get frustrated. But I guess, good news will always come when you least expect it and God will actually grant you things at the right time and moment.

Well, THANK YOU GOD! (except that I shouldn't be drinking alcohol again until end of next year. huhuhu)

Did my first ultrasound in early October at around 5 weeks, just to make sure everything is ok and I am actually really pregnant. Haha.

Yes, doctor said confirm pregnant

In fact, I only broke the news to my family and in laws around this time. My mom is obviously overjoyed! Yeah, she has been bugging me to start having kids since like forever and the news really made her cry. My sister even took a video of that and whatsapp-ed me. That moment then only I felt like crying as well. WTH. Anyways, I broke the news to my family over whatsapp with a picture of the ultrasound along with a reminder NOT to tell anyone (extended family or friends just yet) and also don't ever try to stop me from doing Zumba.

First trimester

I am actually quite lucky not to be experiencing any major morning sickness. Just nausea and a heightened sense of smell. Any aromatic cooking, spices, garlic, korean sauces all those gonna kill me. It didn't make me vomit but it will be very unpleasant. Body odour and strong perfumes as well. Basically, I prefer to have a face mask on everywhere I go especially when there's a lot of people. Weird mouth taste that also made me brush my teeth 2 to 3 times a day. LOL. Sama memang sa cari mangga la. Yang berabis ni mangga saja. Makan yang asam jak sampai gastrik. Bongok betul.

Since in KL, it was kinda hard to find young mangoes. I am lucky to have scheduled all my flights going back often during my first trimester. It is just so to happen that I have to commute a lot KK and KL during October and November for my thesis stuff and also for the food court that I am managing. I breezed through my proposal defence in my first trimester too. Thank God for the easy experience. Except I need to have snacks in my bag like all the time to avoid feeling dizzy. 

Zumba are as usual but with decreased frequency of classes per week. I keep forgetting that I am carrying so at times I tend to jump around a lot like usual. Energy also running low since I no longer can take my energy cubes that contains high dose of caffeine. I am on my own. Adui. 

Not much difference. I didn't gain any weight for the first trimester as well


Second trimester

As I am typing this post, I am at 19 weeks pregnant. Went to Japan for Asia Zumba Conference at 12 weeks and I got my mom so worried. Still haven't tell any of my friends yet (yes, even my best friends) - I am just not ready to share the news. It's good news (I know right!) but I also know some of my friends have been trying to have babies as well. I know the feeling when someone over shared their good news. So, I am just keeping this to myself until photos on social media can be self explanatory.

However the ladies at the studio that I am teaching Zumba know about me being pregnant already. The owner of the studio announced it after she found out recently as well. Yes, everyone is offering me advice not to jump so much and taking it easy. I appreciate that a lot. But at times, I kinda feel trapped. You know what I mean. I somehow got their worried look all the time in class these days.

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I do not know when I will get this blog post out. I actually have announced it on my zumba blog and also on my Youtube channel but definitely not on mainstream Facebook profile. I am too scared of criticism as I still teach classes. Confirm kena kecam.

But when it gets posted, I just want to tell you all that I am pregnant. Hehehe. Expecting the baby to come out somewhere in early June. Tapi harap harap Kaamatan baby lah.




4 comments:

beaty said...

congrats and enjoy ur pregnancy

Joan said...

Thank you! :)

chegu carol said...

You know, when you posted the zumba pre-natal class photo on instagram, i somehow have this inclination to think that you are pregnant. hahahaha...i dunno, all this while seeing how new mothers reveal their good news through hints and what not, sa rasa sa mahir sudah meneka. kunun. hahahaha...anyways, TAHNIAH!!! i am tumpang happy for you. in fact as i read this, i feel lump in my throat. terharu. Take care!!!

Joan said...

Thank you moi! actually i am more scared to offend people with the good news sometimes cos I understand also being on the other side.