Monday, April 07, 2008

feeling of inadequacy

"Beauty Magazines will make you think you look fat and ugly"

I guess its kinda true la. How do you feel if you flip through the magazines and saw these
daphne iking

They are SO Smokin' Hot! and they are Sabahans, but why they don't look like pindik-pindik tagap. Well, you might say they are celebrities and they are groomed to look like that.

So, how about them, my real friends, real people, I saw them growing up and they look GOOD.

puzzled? I am. I used to be a-not-more-than-50kg girl. But, now it is so far from reach. Damn! I read Yu Jian's blog on weight issues as well. I guess I am definitely not all alone with this. Yet, I am still not satisfied with what I have. People can look like model, why not me? Or at least be fit.I am the fatty one. And I am so far to being like her..;((..HELP!Hannah Tan


Funkmother said...

Sorry to hear you're feeling down. Things might seem bad at the moment and sometimes its hard to see past the present problems. The ride might get a bit bumpy but hold tight and you'll see it through.

I think society gives people unrealistic expectations. We get shown nice cars and nice clothes and we can't always have them. Magazines show us photos of people who are unnaturally skinny. Hell, I saw a show on TV that said most of those girls in magazines are 14 years old! How can a 23 year old be the shape of a 14 year old? Its not natural.

You need to know, you're not ugly and you're not fat. Be happy with who you are. I'm sure you've got many fine qualities. Focus on the positive things.

I know you don't know me and I don't know whether I've said anything here that will help you. I just want you to be happy with yourself and your situation. I've been in the situation where I've been out of work and couldn't afford anything much, let alone nice cars and nice clothes. My relationship with my partner was not going well and I had 2 young children to care for. I felt my back was to the wall. It was very depressing but then I realised something. As long as my family was healthy and had food on the table and a roof over our heads, nothing else mattered.

Maybe you need to focus on the positive. Think of the good things you have. Its wrong that you can be made to be miserable by seeing things that you can't have, or in the case of body shape, things that don't apply to you. Hell, I'd like to be shaped like Mr. Universe, but that aint me! Be happy with yourself. I know some of these issues seem like "show stoppers" at the moment, but that will change. Enjoy life and try not to worry about the little things that don't really matter.


Joan said...

hey thanx. definitely made me feel better. yet couldn't help still having low self esteem especially concerning body shape and was just today, that my friend said I gained weight. and yeah, it's true...wawawawa :(

Funkmother said...

Well, what sort of a friend is that? I wouldn't go telling a friend something that I know is going to upset them. But ultimately, its all a matter of perception. Like I say, I'm sure you have plenty of positive attributes. Do your friends ever tell you that you're kind and caring? They're the sort of things you need to hear about and they're the things you need to focus on. They're your assets.

Earthy Emily said...

hi joan! Don't worry too much. Take ur meal at regular time every day. E.g breakfast 7 am, lunch 12.30 pm, dinner 7 pm. Of course, you can also take the in-between meals. It works for me.

Dazeree Joan said...

My friend is doing a paper on the portrayal of women in cleo magazine for her final year research paper. U should read it.

its not right and worth it to place self-worth merely on physical attraction.

signed, a feminist

ps/ i think ur beautiful joan. :)

Joan said...

milai..thanks a lot for the tips


dazeree..thanx gurl n i am really interested to read ur friends paper on that cleo mag thingy..